I applaud anyone who has decided to adopt a greener frame of mind. In fact, I believe that whatever shade of green you embrace, our world is better off because of it. So many of us know that the simple act of thinking about something and carefully considering how we can make it click in our brains can become the catalyst we require for long term change. Once we determine what realistic lifestyle modifications we're comfortable transforming into daily habits, living in a way that honors the best interests of Mother Nature can become as effortless as breathing. Common activities can end up taking on a higher sense of purpose when we recognize that the world really doesn't revolve around our own needs. Instead of asking, "What's in it for me?" the global greenification of humankind may actually compel many of us to ask, "WWMND?" (What would Mother Nature do?)
Making a commitment to consistently walk along an environmentally responsible path can require deep resolve for some. I'm not quite sure where I personally register on the greenometer, but I know that I try to step up my eco-efforts and incorporate positive new conservational habits on a regular basis. Still, as a sincere greenie, I should be willing to put my money where my mouth is. With that spirit in mind, I decided to take on an extremely eco-conscious personal challenge - to boldly go where no one in my household has gone before - to the final zero percent garbage frontier...at least for one day. That's right -- bring it on. Time to show ‘em what I'm made of!
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7:00 A.M.
Officially emerge from bed in order to feed geriatric moaning, whining, apparently starving clan of cats (four in all). In half-asleep-half-awake stupor, I divide two 5.5 ounce cans of food between them. While they plow through their grub, I rinse out each tin and triumphantly deposit them into my recycling bin. In fact, I'm so conscientious that I remove the labels and segregate them with my other recycled household paper items. Wow, I rock. This whole "no garbage thing" is a cinch!
GARBAGE GENERATED: None
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 5 (out of 5 total)
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7:21 A.M.
Must give sweet my male geriatric mushpot cat 1 1/2 units of PZI insulin with a one-time-use needle. Heyyyy, I can't help it -- there's no green alternative!! Not willing to compromise his health and well-being despite carrying huge eco-guilt thanks to twice-daily habit. Tried countless times (in past) to find out how to recycle this red bag waste, to no avail. Greenie's hands tied.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Absolutely.
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 0 (out of 5 total)
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7:43 A.M.
Finish up in shower. Really want to blow nose since water is swishing around nasal passages, but commitment to zero garbage generation is especially die-hard. Brush teeth. Prepare to floss...on second thought, teeth are clean enough. Blow dry hair instead. Ha-ha - see? No garbage generated in 22 whole minutes!! Finish entire morning grooming ritual without making single deposit in trash can.
GARBAGE GENERATED: None
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 5 (out of 5 total)
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8:10 A.M.
Pop vitamins. Chug water. Open fridge to take inventory of desirable edibles. Eyes gaze longingly at pre-made burrito. Temptation squashed thanks to non-recyclable wrapper ensuring its presumably phenomenal freshness. End up settling on far-less-desirable but exceedingly more eco-friendly yogurt in recyclable plastic cup with foil lid. Brew cup of green tea. Use same tea bag four times (‘cause I'm cheap like that) before depositing filter in makeshift eggshell-coffee-grounds-tea-bag collection bin underneath sink. Still hungry. Poke around in cupboards. Seduced by handy-dandy granola bar. Mmmm-yummy. Really should recycle Mylar wrapper with TerraCycle. Bad greenie. Too lazy to accumulate required 200 wrappers before mailing out.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Yup...one guilty granola bar wrapper.
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 3 (out of 5 total)
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8:18 A.M.
Sit in front of computer. Work-work-work whole morning long.
9:24 A.M.
Must make bathroom pit stop. Hmmm. Does flushing tissue down toilet count as garbage?!? Should have thought more carefully about greenie rules and regulations before launching experiment. Carefully consider options. Don't own bidet but would sure love one right about now. Have plenty of crunchy leaves floating around outside, but too much of a sissy to use them. Okay. It's official -- bathroom activities exempt from eco-experiment.
9:27 A.M.
Sit back in front of computer. Work-work-work some more.
12:49 P.M.
Ready for lunch. Chop up celery and radishes. Mix with leftover cooked chicken in Ziplock bag (uh-oh...). Tempted to rinse out Ziplock and reuse it, but kinda slimy. Good to repurpose for kitty litter poop bag. Ha - so resourceful! Add last of mayonnaise to chicken mixture. Rinse out mayo container but notice #7 plastic symbol on bottom. Totally unfair. Good recycling intentions thwarted since #7 not collected in my region. Bahhhh! But wait a second -- brilliant idea. Will reuse container for homemade salad dressing. Garbage disaster averted.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Squeaky green (aside from bathroom exemption)!
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 3.5 (out of 5 total)...truth be told, I feel a little guilty about bathroom exemption.
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3:54 P.M.
Violent upchucking sound in background. Cat vomiting again! Nooooooo, not on the dining room chairrrr!! Scoop up pile ‘o goo with eco-friendly Twist Sponge. Other cat coughing up hairball simultaneously. Can life get any worse?!? Scrub my little heart out, rinse and repeat 78 times. You can't be serious. Flippin' eco-sponge deteriorating into mini-shreds. Adding insult to injury, revolting cat bile terminally staining formerly white sponge. Disgustingly ugly now. Talk about poor timing. Feel defeated. Garbage can mocks me.
GARBAGE GENERATED: One vomit-encrusted sponge.
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 2 (out of 5 total)
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4: 37 P.M.
Feel pouty. Must eat massive quantities of chocolate. Everything in disposable wrappers!!!! Grrrrr, bad mood just got worse!!!! Stop it...exercise restraint -- eat just one piece. Mission impossible. Gimme gobs ‘o chocky - green aspirations, be damned!
GARBAGE GENERATED: 7 assorted "fun size" wrappers.
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 0 (out of 5 total)
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6:12 P.M.
Time to make dinner. Determined to become greenie superstar and redeem myself. Search cupboards and refrigerator for suitable meal components. Better use 1 pound package of organic beef before it goes bad. Argh!! It's shrink-wrapped in plastic with disposable absorbent pad (soaked with moo-blood). Strike one. Cook beef in frying pan. Drain fat...oh GOD...where??? Not supposed to put in compost pile. Hmm, use brain!! Take two slices of old bread and soak up fat...noooo, not for ME...donate to hungry forest animals! Open can of diced tomatoes and can of beans. Dump into pan with beef. Recycle cans - yippee! Add savory spices. Really need some sort of starch to make ingredients stick to ribs. Too lazy to boil grains from scratch. Decide to make box of "Mexican" Rice-R-Roni. Everything fine and dandy...cardboard box recyclable...but then - seasoning packet messes with my head. Chemically flavors tucked into dopey wrapper with paper exterior and Mylar interior. What demonic combo is this?!? Too late to change mind. Greenometer registering in murky waters.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Bloody beef packaging and seasoning pouch
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: 2 (out of 5 total)...come on, fat repurposing must count for something.
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7:00 P.M.
Cat feeding time, again. Recycle cans and labels...greenie redemption within reach. Hold your horses. Insulin time = red bag waste in our landfills. Just face it -- you and your little needle-dependent cat suck.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Waaaahhhhhh!!
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: Ha-ha-ha! Have you already forgotten just how much you suck?
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10:35 P.M.
Get ready for bed. Scrub face with last bit of gentle cleansing wash. Bad timing, as usual. Turns out it's in piece of @$*&ing! non-recyclable container. Return to cabinet - out of sight, out of mind. Teeth studded with bits of dinner...begging to be flossed. Someone's out to get me. Decide to use tiny piece of floss and constantly rinse off after using on each tooth. So resourceful! Raise minor green effort up to lofty heights of greenitude by tying floss around pinkie. What makes that so green? Great reminder that zero garbage generation experiment only realistic for Barbie dolls, cartoons and figments of my warped imagination.
GARBAGE GENERATED: Oh, pu-leeeze.
ECO-BROWNIE POINTS: Revoked for infinity.
Leslie C.
said on October 20, 2009
Leslie C.
said on October 20, 2009
I also rinse out and reuse ZIPlocks - most of the time - but when they get super sliimy I rinse and put them into the recycle bin.
I don't think the sponge counts as garbage since it's biodegradable right? ;)
Good use of the fat - I do that myself for the critters. But fat is also good if you're making rice - you throw the fat in there with the required water and it makes the rice more flavorful (and yes, more fattening). :D
Anita Quincy
said on October 20, 2009
Elizah, I think your experiment was great and it encourages me to try something similar in my home. Thanks.
Barnabas Abraham
said on October 20, 2009
I personally cannot believe we haven't found an alternative to the dreaded 'clear film' that cannot be recycled.