I remember my Mom telling me about the local salons from back in her younger days, and how she could easily smell them from the next town over due to the myriad of chemicals in use. Today, that key ingredient of Sodium Hydroxide (or Potassium Hydroxide, both better know as "Lye") has either been replaced with milder alternatives or simply diluted, but it somehow still burns with enough intensity that I almost know how albinos feel in the summertime. It is a burn that is wholly unique and variable, yet strong; every salon experience has continued to strengthen my tolerance for pain. Two days ago, in fact, I accidently sliced open my hand with a seraded knife during my lunchbreak, and my only thought was in regards to when my bagel would finally be done toasting so that I could enjoy that glorious gnosh. At this rate, childbirth will feel like a charlie horse in ten years' time. In all honesty, it was when Edward Norton's Nameless Yuppie of "Fight Club" fame first experienced the horror of chemical burn that I first experienced the odd thrill of paradoxical laughter.
Pictured from Right to Left: Brad Pitt, Lye, Complete Sissy
So now that we've finally reached the end of this thorough description of torture, many of you readers are probably wondering "Good god, why?!" But we all know that logic is never involved in the processes of maintaining socially acceptable standards of beauty and "professionalism." So I'll bring up the other question: are these new relaxers and perms any better for the body than the smelly ones of yore?
One answer I came up with was through trying a new product. My trusted stylist recently applied something called an "anti-curl" on my hair instead of any of the harsher products that I have traditionally used (my hair texture has never called for a particularly caustic product in the first place, not even the mild ones). The results? A completely painless experience that produced roots as smooth as silk, without a single sore or rash to show for it. So My Ladies, get to know your hair, and make sure your stylist takes the time to do the same. Regardless of ethnicity, a truly skilled stylist should know that not all hair is created equal, not even when it's on the same scalp. A good stylist should also know how to handle all types of hair, and strive to make sure that he or she is treating yours with respect; PRODUCTS SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BURN IN ORDER TO WORK. This is not the 20th century.
Too Soon?
Other (short) answers can also be uncovered through research, but my own research has so far come up with one article that mentioned one study that allegedly concluded that no link was found between chemical relaxers and breast cancer. However, there was no link to the actual study. In fact, I couldn't really find any links to any solid studies that might explore other possibilities; breast cancer isn't the only disease that disproportionately affects black women: What about lung cancer? Respiratory illnesses? "Lost Groove" Syndrome? The scalp supposedly doesn't absorb chemical hair products as much as people fear, yet we are strongly encouraged (read: required) to put a protective coating on it prior to applying such products, and wear gloves when handling them. Not bad advice when considering the fact that chemical relaxers have also been known to eventually cause thinning of the hair and even baldness, much like the effects of radiation posioning without the joy of anal bleeding.
Not Pictured: A Chernobyl Victim
Absorption through the scalp and skin isn't even the only concern. Many who perform these treatments on themselves often end up ingesting small amounts of it at some point, and children in particular are vulnerable to this issue, which is why I never encourage anyone who asks to use home perm kits (I firmly stand by my own mother's advice: bad haircuts grow out, and bad dye jobs can be redone, but a bad perm can last for years...Assuming you still have hair left to fix). If money is an issue, have a friend or a relative who knows what they are doing help you out, or visit your local beauty school: they will often run clinics where students will provide styling services at huge discounts, and the instuctors are always present to make sure that their pupils aren't ruining life.
Thousands of dollars did not need to be spent to scientifically determine that children generally hate eating vegetables. With this in mind, more studies probably aren't performed on relaxer and perm effects, because we can already determine what these well-known chemicals will do to the human body over time. My Ladies, if you can't go natural, at least dive into the new, gentler products and trends that are popping up, for your sake if not for Mother Earth's.
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